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A Journey to Authenticity

Welcome to the vibrant month of September 2023. We’ve traversed through time once again, and I’m thrilled to connect with all of you. If you’re tuning in to this message, it’s a signal that a world of new opportunities awaits our Rogue members. From career challenges to collab labs, and fresh lessons and workshops, there’s an artistic feast awaiting you this month. So, whether you’re already immersed in the creative flow or just about to dive in, be sure to explore September’s exciting offerings.

Speaking of diving in, I’ve got something profound to share with you for this month. As creators, I urge you to set aside some time for introspection and contemplation. It’s time to embark on a journey to uncover your artistic voice. We recently had a captivating discussion in a live podcast about discovering one’s voice as an artist – an exploration that goes far beyond your chosen medium.

I’m aware that many of you have already taken steps down this path. You create from the heart, you infuse your essence into your art, and you know the essence of finding your voice. But let’s be real, not everyone fully comprehends this journey. Some may not grasp the immense power and significance of discovering their own unique artistic voice. So, let’s break it down and explore the reasons why this journey is worth every ounce of effort.

When you delve deep into the realm of your artistic voice, you’re actually tapping into your distinct perspective. It’s a journey of understanding your artistic identity and your essence as a human being. This is more than just making art – it’s about baring your soul through your creations. I get it, it’s easy to get caught up in the whirlwind of trends and popular styles. But, believe me, the real magic happens when you authentically express yourself.

Think about it – when you chase trends or create just for popularity’s sake, you’re not truly speaking your truth. You’re not sharing your unique perspective, your personal quirks, your passions that make you, well, you. The consequence? A lack of authentic connection with your audience. It’s like trying to fit into a mold that doesn’t quite match your shape. And guess what? You’re better than that.

The world, as it stands, often emphasizes conformity. We’re often taught that fitting in equates to happiness. But let me tell you, the real treasures of connection come from embracing your individuality. When you do that, your art becomes an extension of yourself. That’s where the true power lies – in being unapologetically, unmistakably you.

I’ve seen this firsthand in my artistic journey. From sculptures to paintings, my art reflects me, and that’s what makes it instantly recognizable. It’s the authentic cohesion across all mediums, a common thread woven through each piece. This brings us to an essential point – whether you’re crafting jewelry, composing music, weaving words, or creating videos, your unique voice will infuse a consistent essence into all your creations.

This month, I want you to focus on more than just art. Consider your life’s trajectory. Are you chasing after an elusive something without a clear vision? Or are you living a life brimming with personal fulfillment? Connect these dots. Envision what you desire and tie it to your art. Your voice should echo your aspirations, your dreams, your essence.

In a nutshell, I urge you to dive deep into your artistic voice this month. Contemplate, reflect, and let your true self emerge in your creations. Dismiss the fear of rejection – it’s merely a sieve that separates those who resonate with your truth from those who don’t. Remember, those who change the world are the ones who walk their unique path, not the well-trodden road.

Go forth and embrace this transformative journey. Paint, sculpt, sing, or write with the colors of your essence. Unleash your voice upon the world. You’ve got this, and remember, you are nothing short of a creative genius.

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How Being An Artist Changed My Life

Today, I want to discuss some of the things that have fueled my art career and kept me going, even during challenging times. As you’ve probably heard me say a thousand times, persistence is crucial in this line of work, and it’s essential to navigate the numerous roadblocks and emotional hurdles that come our way. To truly establish a thriving art career that connects with people and allows personal growth, we must embrace creativity as a catalyst for progress.

First and foremost, creativity serves as a powerful tool for self-expression. It allows us to delve into our inner thoughts, emotions, and ideas, enabling us to communicate them uniquely and authentically. It’s crucial to stay true to ourselves and not chase after financial gain alone. By staying authentic and real, our art reflects who we are rather than a pursuit of monetary rewards.

Additionally, engaging in creative activities provides an avenue for mindfulness and relaxation. When we immerse ourselves in the act of creation, we find solace in the present moment. As artists and as humans, we often get caught up in predicting the future or dwelling on the past. However, true mindfulness lies in fully focusing on the now. When I create art, my entire attention is devoted to the process, allowing me to relax and be fully present. It’s almost meditative, and many artists find themselves unintentionally practicing mindfulness during their creative sessions.

Another valuable aspect of creativity is problem-solving. Creating a work of art is akin to a continuous process of trial and error, requiring constant course correction. This mirrors life itself, as we must move forward, taking steps even when we’re unsure of the outcome. When creating art, we must confront challenges head-on and persistently correct our course until we’re satisfied with the result. This fosters innovative thinking and problem-solving skills, which are not only essential in art but also in our everyday lives. Embracing the mindset of resolving obstacles instead of blaming external factors empowers us to overcome any hurdle that comes our way.

Furthermore, being an artist cultivates emotional intelligence. Art is deeply emotional and connects us to the world around us. Even the seemingly mundane, like observing a flower and capturing its essence through a photograph or painting, can evoke powerful emotions. As artists, we can explore and invest more time into these seemingly insignificant moments. Engaging in art allows for self-reflection, personal growth, and enhanced self-awareness. It is our responsibility to acknowledge and understand our own emotional responses, both in our art and in life.

Risk-taking and resilience are integral parts of being an artist. To pursue this path, we must step outside our comfort zones and embrace the mindset of resilience. When we commit ourselves to the artist’s journey, regardless of the challenges that arise, we develop the courage to face failure and learn from it. This mindset not only applies to our artistic endeavors but also permeates all areas of life. We become more adaptable and better equipped to overcome any obstacle life presents.

Creativity also enhances our ability to communicate and collaborate effectively. As artists, we might initially struggle with public speaking or showcasing our work. However, by engaging with fellow artists, collectors, and participating in artistic events, we gradually become more adept at expressing our ideas, actively listening, and collaborating with others. Art is a form of communication, and by putting ourselves out there, we break free from the constraints of feeling small or introverted.

Moreover, being an artist encourages continuous learning. The world of art is vast, offering endless possibilities for growth, experimentation, and exploration. We expand our horizons by constantly learning new techniques, styles, and mediums. Curiosity becomes our driving force, and the journey becomes as important as the destination. As artists, we’re attuned to the world, paying attention to details, and constantly seeking new discoveries.

Lastly, art and creativity bring joy, happiness, and fulfillment. Creating something meaningful and witnessing its positive impact on others is incredibly rewarding. The ability to express ourselves authentically and make a positive difference nourishes our sense of purpose and well-being. I am grateful that through my art, I have found true happiness and fulfillment in my life. While financial stability is important, it is secondary to the deep satisfaction of living a purpose-driven life as an artist.

So, my fellow rogue artists, I hope you find inspiration in these thoughts. Embrace your creativity as a means of personal growth, and remember that your artistic journey is about becoming a better version of yourself. The happiness and sense of purpose that art brings are invaluable. Keep creating, keep putting yourself out there, and remember that the more authentic you are, the more you will connect with others.
Thank you for being part of this amazing artistic community. You are all truly awesome, and I adore each and every one of you. Until next time, have an incredible week filled with creativity. Adios!

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The Power of Life’s Moments

People often ask me, “What inspires you and your art?” It’s a question that requires a deeper understanding of the creative process. While renowned artists like Picasso, Warhol, or Dali may appear to be obvious sources of inspiration, the truth is that their art, in itself, doesn’t inspire me. Rather, it is life and the experiences it offers that fuel my creativity. On this dreary day, I want to share some rambles on inspiration and how the stuff of life shapes our artistic endeavors.

Creative Inspiration Is An Interesting Beast

When we create, it comes from within us, where we observe, absorb, and reflect on our emotions and reactions to the world around us. It’s the essence of life itself. While I may draw inspiration from various sources, the tapestry of existence truly moves me. Allow me to elaborate.

Last year, I embarked on a road trip to attend my daughter’s wedding in Illinois. Due to the pandemic, it had been years since we had seen our family, making this journey even more special. As we traveled, those moments in the car allowed me to decompress and fully embrace the anticipation of reconnecting with loved ones. It was a mix of excitement, mental preparation, and the knowledge that we would experience something truly significant.

Connected To The Universe By Rafi Perez

Arriving at our destination, we were greeted with conversations, smiles, and all the interactions that make up our lives. These moments, whether joyful, heated, or melancholic, are the stuff of life. They inspire us, shape us, and teach us valuable lessons about ourselves and what we aspire to become. The art we create becomes an expression of our unique perspectives on the world and the things we often take for granted.

In a fast-paced, busy world, it’s easy to let life pass us by. We become focused on destinations and overlook the beauty of the journey itself. However, it is precisely in those small moments, the instances of triumph and joy, and even the heartaches, that we find inspiration. These experiences enable us to overcome obstacles and grow as individuals. Feeling our way through the world is the key to unlocking innovation and creativity.

I’m Born With It By Artist Rafi Perez

The Power of Authenticity & Perspective

In a society that often encourages us to suppress or hide our feelings, we must realize that our emotions are a powerful expression of our authentic selves. By embracing our feelings, we allow ourselves to be fully present and in tune with the world. It’s essential to understand that hiding our emotions equates to hiding who we are and how we perceive the world.

Perspective shapes our experiences and influences how we perceive the world. I refuse to let external conditions dictate my ideas of what it means to be successful. Instead, I immerse myself in the process of creation, cherishing the moments spent creating. It’s a reminder that our focus should be on the things that bring us happiness and fulfillment, rather than dwelling on what we lack or wishing for something better.

Becoming Tree Of Life Necklace Ocean Jasper 14k Gold Filled Klee Angelie Jewelry

From Struggle to Empowerment

In my own journey, there was a time when I wished for a better life, feeling trapped by circumstances that seemed less than ideal. But at some point, I realized that if I wanted change, I needed to take control and create the life I desired. Through risk-taking and embracing vulnerability, I started to build something amazing. And the message I want to share is that if I can do it, anyone can. We can all live a creative life, find happiness, and continue moving forward, even in the face of challenges. In your vulnerability, you will find authenticity.

Living authentically means embracing who we are and being present in every moment. It means recognizing that our thoughts, ideas, and emotions matter. When we express ourselves genuinely, whether through art, music, or other creative outlets, we invite others to connect with our unique perspective. It’s a powerful way to inspire and resonate with those who encounter our work.

Aquamarine Drop Necklace Sterling Fine Silver 18k Gold by Klee Angelie Jewelry

In a world that often pushes us to be constantly striving for more and overlooking the “now”, it’s crucial to remember that inspiration lies in the moments we experience and the emotions we feel. Life itself is the greatest source of inspiration for artists. By embracing the journey, feeling our way through the world, and living authentically, we unlock our creative potential and find fulfillment in the beauty that surrounds us.

So, the next time you find yourself caught up in the busyness of life, take a moment to pause, look around, and appreciate the simple joys. Embrace the moments, both big and small, and let them fuel your creative spirit. Remember, you have the power to shape your own perspective and create a life filled with beauty, purpose, and inspiration.

Metamorphosis By Artist Rafi Perez
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Embrace Failure

Welcome to a Monday motivational blog! This week, I want to discuss the importance of failure in success. Anyone who is successful has faced failure at some point in their career. Our entire creative career is built on failure, and we are very proud of that. It’s funny to me that we’ve developed into a culture of people that are afraid to fail. But the truth is, failure is a necessary ingredient in success.

I think about our career and how many times we failed in trying to do something new or deciding to go in a particular direction, and how many times we fell on our faces. But every time, we chose to get back up, dust ourselves off, and keep going. Recently, we built the Rogue community website, and we had a lot of troubleshooting. We had dozens of failed attempts to troubleshoot issues on the site. But every time it didn’t work out, we would say, “Okay, we’ve eliminated another thing that it’s not.”

In my mind, being successful has everything to do with the ability to embrace failure and learn from it. Failure is only failure if you quit.

I always think about it this way, on your deathbed, if you’re going to regret not doing this thing, then just do it, fail at it as many times as you need to. Fall on your face, pick yourself up, and keep going. Because failure is not just an ingredient, it is a necessary ingredient of success.

At the end of the day, there will always be something that gets messed up, but that’s just the par for the course. You do it, you mess something up, and next time, you do it differently. Embrace failure, learn from it, and keep moving forward.

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How I Pull Myself Out Of A Downward Spiral

Hello, amazing artists! Today, I want to talk about something personal, something that’s fresh in my mind. I haven’t been feeling well for about two weeks now, and this week, I started to feel overwhelmed and went into a downward spiral.

Pursuing an art career and feeling like nothing is coming from it can lead to overwhelming roadblocks and obstacles. I want to talk about what I did in that place and share it with you, hoping it will help you out.

Emotions and feelings are the most important things to look at and face when pursuing an art career. Discouragement and going into a downward spiral can kill your art career because it causes you to decide to stop.

Let me share with you what happened to me. Everything was on track with the art business, and the studio was finally open, but a big storm hit on the day we were ready to go. A giant tree in our yard was swaying, and a big branch fell off that tree, just missing our house. Looking at the tree during the storm, I knew it had to come down, but our finances have been stretched thin after the move and the studio being shut down for so long. We’re still recovering. The idea of paying for the project was daunting because we have more debt than I’m comfortable with.

So, I devised a plan for taking the tree down that involves creating art from it. In the meantime, I ordered a printer and invested a fair amount of money that we didn’t have into it. I decided to rerelease my prints, something that’s easy for me to do, and it’s not very expensive as far as price goes, with a good profit margin. I released my prints, but nothing happened, which is typical. That’s how it works. However, I discovered that I was focused on the lack of money because of the tree, and other things I didn’t realize were brewing in my mind.

I immediately found myself in a downward spiral, feeling hopeless and not wanting to do anything. I knew I had to snap out of it, so I started to do something about it. I decided to focus on what I could control: creating art. I started planning the artwork with the tree and the fallen branch. I also decided to share my experience with you, hoping that it could help someone out there who is going through something similar.

The first step is to acknowledge your feelings and emotions. Don’t deny them, but don’t let them take over you. The second step is to focus on what you can control. Create art, write, read, or do something that makes you happy. The third step is to change your mindset. Don’t focus on the lack of money or the things you can’t do. Focus on what you can do and the opportunities that come your way.

It’s essential to surround yourself with a community of people who are supportive of your art and your journey. Join a group, attend art shows, or reach out to someone who inspires you. It’s also important to take care of yourself physically and mentally.

Pursuing an art career can be challenging, and it’s okay to feel discouraged and overwhelmed. But it’s essential to acknowledge your feelings, focus on what you can control, and change your mindset. Remember that you are not alone, and there is always a way forward. Keep creating and keep going.

In life, there are moments when things don’t go as planned, and it’s easy to fall into negative thinking patterns. You start to downward spiral, and before you know it, you’re consumed by worries and regrets.

Challenging negative thoughts is a powerful step to breaking free from the downward spiral.
These thoughts are often patterns we have developed over time, and it’s essential to identify them and challenge them by asking ourselves, “Is this really true?” Look for evidence that contradicts your negative thoughts. For example, if you think you will never succeed in something, look for examples of people who started from scratch and succeeded.

Another powerful technique is mindfulness. When we’re in the midst of a downward spiral, we’re often thinking about something that hasn’t even happened yet, and we’re worrying about things we can’t control. Mindfulness is about staying in the present and focusing on what’s happening right now. When we’re mindful, we’re not distracted by worries and regrets, and we’re better able to deal with the challenges we face.

Taking a break from everything is also essential. Sometimes, it may be necessary to take a day or two off to regain our balance and find our center. It’s crucial to remember that our emotions are important, and we need to take care of ourselves.

If you’re struggling with negative thoughts and finding it difficult to break free, seek help. Talk to someone who can offer you guidance and support. Sometimes, we need to lean on others to help us get through challenging times.

We all experience moments of negative thinking and downward spirals, but we have the power to break free from them. By challenging negative thoughts, practicing mindfulness, and seeking support when needed, we can overcome any obstacle and find our way back to a place of peace and happiness. Remember, your thoughts and emotions matter, and you have the power to shape your reality.

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PODCAST 130: How We Deal With Creativity Critics

In this podcast, Klee and I discuss creativity critics. These art critics side-seat you and have unsolicited advice on what you are doing. To find out more about us, visit http://www.rafiandklee.com


LISTEN TO THE LATEST EPISODES

Art Blocks And Brain Farts – Artist Podcast ARTIST PODCAST With Rafi And Klee

In this podcast, Rafi and Klee discuss how to handle art blacks and brain farts in your art studio. The also answer a few artist questions from the community. WHO ARE RAFI AND KLEE STUDIOS Curious about who we are? Visit our website and get to know us and all we do. https://rafiandklee.com/ WANT TO KNOW MORE ABOUT OUR COMMUNITY ON PATREON? https://rafiandklee.com/patreon/ Thank you for supporting the Artist Life Podcast with Rafi and Klee! You rock!
  1. Art Blocks And Brain Farts – Artist Podcast
  2. How To Get Creative For 2026 – Artist Podcast
  3. Less Is More Is Our New Creative Mantra – Artist Podcast
  4. Comparing Yourself Is A Crock
  5. How to Take Lead In Your Art Career When You Want To Be In The Background
  6. Are You A Hobbyist Or A Pro Artist?
  7. Stop Believing The Starving Artist Lie
  8. Getting People To Notice Your Art
  9. Rituals To Get Creative Or Just Weird
  10. Don’t Let Them Make You Quit Your Art – Artist Podcast

LISTEN TO US ON YOUR PREFERRED PODCAST PLATFORM

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Sharing Who You Are Matters

Sometimes, things suck. Sometimes we feel like what we have to share doesn’t matter. However, the world may need exactly what you have to share. More love, more support, more creativity, more awesomeness!

Buying an old house can be quite demanding. It’s been about four months since we signed on the dotted line and moved in. The plan originally was to have our art studio up and running, explore all the art happenings in town, and get the pre- order books out to all the amazing people who ordered them. Oh yeah, and we would be filming and editing the entire process and sharing it with the world.

However, electrical, plumbing, structural, buying furnishings, and other issues decided that our overly ambitious plans would have to take a backseat to life. Life… It’s always there, lurking pleasantly in the hopes that you’ll remember that you are human and you are alive.

Honestly, it’s been awesome. The good, the bad, the stressful, and the overwhelming. The fact of the matter is that we are quite lucky to be having first world problems like “plumbing issues” because it could be much more serious.

As we reach the end of the plumbing saga, and prepare to sit down and finish the books that were originally supposed to go out over a year ago, I am reminded of the love and patience displayed by all the people out there who support us.

As you know we have had an adventurous year with many many changes. At the beginning of the Indiegogo book campaign of writing on rogue marketing, I never expected the challenges and changes that have taken place. A global pandemic, struggles with close friends, political drama, a hurricane, power outages, an infestation of fungus gnats, a large solo art exhibition, winning awards, an epic adventure, a devastating leak, and buying our dream home with it’s own challenges. During last year, we have had some really dark times, and some sunshine… and through it all, you were there… patiently supporting this book. Supporting us, and that means the world to me.

So, thank you. We will be quiet for a couple weeks as we go into hermit book mode and get our books polished and ready for release. We will also be building the studio back up (finally) for our opening on April 1st.

If this adventure has shown me anything, it is this… It’s easy to want to get wrapped up in all of the crap that happens in life and the world. It’s easy to isolate and believe that what you do doesn’t matter in the grand scheme of things. It’s easy to believe that everything is so much bigger than you and you are but an insignificant spec.

However, people I have never met in my life have brought sunshine and light to some moments that were difficult. Simply by showing support, joy, and giving in their own unique way. We all have that gift, we all have something to give, we all have something to share… and it matters… it ALL matters.

So, as I get ready to release a book full of my thoughts and words out into the world, I am reminded of a special quote that keeps me going when things may seem dark. When asked why he performed at a free concert just two days after getting shot, Bob Marley responded, “The people who are trying to make this world worse aren’t taking a day off. How can I?”

So share more love, more support, more creativity, and more awesomeness! The world can ALWAYS use more of that… We can ALL use more of that. Thank you in advance for being the awesomeness that is you. See you soon.

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We Are All Powerful

It can be very easy to feel small sometimes. The world is so big. The universe is massive. Time keeps moving. In the grand scheme of things our life is but a speck on the camera lens. Yet, we are so much more than we may realize.

We were all born with this amazing power within us. Many people don’t seem to acknowledge the gifts that they have and instead choose to conform to the status quo. It saddens me to see these magical people never go for the things they want out of life. They choose to live what is considered a normal life by the people around them. Never willing to take that first step. Why is that?

CHANGE IS SCARY.
Some of us resist change at all costs. We may do this because we fear that a change will alter the stability we feel. We can be habitual creatures who tend to feel a sense of safety and security when we know what to expect. The problem is that everything changes and evolves. Everything grows and nothing will stay the same, resisting change may lead to a comfortable stagnation in your life. Embracing and becoming comfortable with change allows you to expect the unexpected and not be controlled by fear. It allows you to challenge yourself to believe that no matter what circumstances or situations arise, you will be able to navigate them.


NOT WORTH TAKING THE RISK.
Let’s be honest, not changing can be a risk. However, change is often more associated with risk. Taking a chance on yourself and following your dreams is a risk. Going against the grain is a risk. Creating an art career is a risk. Driving your car to the store is a risk. Everything in life is risky. We tend to forget that we take calculated risks hundreds of times a day in the smallest of decisions. We make determinations and predict outcomes all the time, but at the end of the day, big or small, they’re all just guesses. Following your dreams feels risky because you may have spent many years talking yourself out of it. The question isn’t “is it risky?” because everything is. The question is, are you willing to face the risks? Do you believe that YOU have what it takes to persist through the suck?

If you’re going to try, go all the way. Otherwise, don’t even start. This could mean losing girlfriends, wives, relatives and maybe even your mind. It could mean not eating for three or four days. It could mean freezing on a park bench. It could mean jail. It could mean derision. It could mean mockery–isolation. Isolation is the gift. All the others are a test of your endurance, of how much you really want to do it. And, you’ll do it, despite rejection and the worst odds. And it will be better than anything else you can imagine. If you’re going to try, go all the way. There is no other feeling like that. You will be alone with the gods, and the nights will flame with fire. You will ride life straight to perfect laughter. It’s the only good fight there is.

― Charles Bukowski, Factotum

We all have our own gifts to bring to the world. It could be music, art, poetry, books, leadership, innovation, architecture, love, a smile, conversation, or anything. If these gifts are not making it into the world because you are afraid of the change it will bring or it is too much of a risk, remember your power. The only way these gifts can manifest is by the investment in yourself, believing in yourself, and being willing to go all the way. Persist through the suck. You have the power within you to leave the world a little different than when you came into it.

You are special, you are worth it, and you can do anything you set your mind on. Everything we see around us was created by a human who persisted through the suck, and held onto a desire to live life beyond what they know.

Go all the way, you have the power to do that.

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A Few Thoughts On Impostor Syndrome

I’ve been a creative human for as long as I can remember, and a full time creative for about a decade now. Recently, and many times throughout the years, Rafi and I have talked about impostor syndrome. You know it? The feeling like, even though you’re passionate, authentic, dedicated to your creative endeavors, and growing and evolving each day… that somehow you’re just not enough. That secretly you suck, and that it’s only a matter of time before everyone else discovers your suckage. I suspect most everyone has felt this at one time or another.

If left unchecked, that feeling can really thwart your efforts to share who you are and what you do with the world. I’m guilty of overthinking what I share and say on here, for fear of judgement … analysis paralysis. I’m guilty of the same when working on my art, and especially where music is concerned.

Real-time example, ready?: I second-guessed myself immediately upon embarking on sharing these thoughts with you… and then spellcheck informed me that my spelling of the word “judgement” in the paragraph above was incorrect… so being the human I am, I googled it, and found that both “judgment” and “judgement” are acceptable spellings, but “judgment” is more widely accepted these days. I’ve always spelled it “judgement” so I’ve left it that way, but secretly feared your judgement not only for my chosen spelling, but for my humble human opinions on the topic of impostor syndrome. Who am I to talk about this? I’m just a person with my own thoughts on my own experiences, who, by the way… also misspelled “Impostor” at the beginning of this blog and had to go back and correct it. I think you see what I’m getting at here, all of that happened just trying to share this with you.

The thing is, there’s no rule book for creative and entrepreneurial humans. We’re all just trying stuff and doing the best we can, whatever the best is for us right now. This is one of the reasons I try to share all kinds of things with you guys, my creative family. Not just my creations that I’m proud of, but my failed experiments, challenges, life stuff, thoughts from my brain jar, small victories, and everything in between.

Wear TV Interview


So I wanted to take this time to say this to myself and to you, beautiful human who is reading this. If you are doing something, anything, that you’re passionate about, and making any effort to share it with the world, to put it out there, and to grow as a human and a creative, THAT makes YOU a badass.

You may not be at the level you aspire to yet, I know I’m not, but I’ve realized it’s a lifelong work in progress. You aren’t doing it wrong, and you don’t suck. You don’t have to get it perfect out the gate, just play and try to remember why you love what you do. Try to remember why you love who you are. You are unique, you are beautiful, you are contributing to the whole in your own special way, and you are most definitely enough.


I think ultimately, this is a long-winded high five from me to you, and from me to me. Let’s keep going and bring our awesomeness into full view for 2021 and beyond. Say it with me: “I’m real, and I’m spectacular.”

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Are You Too Emotional?

This month has been personally challenging for us… well, this year has been a challenging cluster of fudge. No matter how much we try to avoid negative crap in our lives, crap happens sometimes… or a lot of times. 

For the most part, Klee and I focus on the positive and look on the bright side of things. Even then, there are times that can get overwhelmingly craptastic. It should come as no big surprise that when stuff goes wrong, things tend to stack one on top of the other. 

This is where the last proverbial straw can easily break the camel’s back. 

“That’s the last straw!!! I can’t take this anymore!!” may come out of your mouth or other less PG statements which all mean the same thing… I have had enough.

No matter how much we focus on the positive and look on the bright side of things, there is always a chance of being overwhelmed by negative emotions and dark thoughts. In other words, when it feels like it is just too much, it is easy to lose your shit.

Some people build a wall around this because they see it as a weakness to get angry or emotional. Usually, these people are more concerned about what other people may think of them, so behind closed doors they struggle in solitude while the world around them only sees what they want them to see. Honestly, this is the culture we all live in. It is normal to put up a strong front for other people when you are literally falling apart inside.

On the flip side to this, you have people that easily lose their shit and become volatile. They are so consumed by their own drama that they completely overlook what the people around them are going through. They become absorbed by what is happening to them and want others to feel empathy without feeling empathy themselves.

I grew up with examples of both.

With one person, I had no idea what they were actually feeling so I would overcompensate to try and get an emotional response. I always felt like I couldn’t get anywhere with them, and when I broached on a subject that was buried, they would lash out and get defensive… that’s usually where the conversation ended and I would walk away feeling like I had done something wrong. Most times this person would tell me I was doing it wrong and it was my fault that they didn’t open up.

With the other person, I was constantly walking on eggshells to make sure I didn’t say, do or have something random go wrong because it would set them off. This is where you try and control circumstances in the environment because you want the other person not to encounter a trigger. I was perpetually trying to predict and prevent anything that would make them upset. Again, I would overcompensate and usually cause a situation to become worse. When this person had a meltdown, they usually got upset with whoever was there and lashed out.

The interesting thing is that everyone has these moments, moments where shit gets to you. Some of us have an explosive moment and reflect and realize that is not who they are or who they want to be… many don’t. 

It’s like the social norm is to be either a person who doesn’t allow feelings to break their social appearance, or you are just an emotional wreck.

The thing is, WE ALL HAVE EMOTIONS… AND WE ALL HAVE A CHOICE ON HOW WE DEAL WITH OUR EMOTIONS. We all lose our shit sometimes, even if you bury feelings or use them as a weapon. The problem is not knowing that there is a big difference between reacting or choosing to respond. I think growing up being called too emotional or that we don’t have feelings is the reason people are not educated in dealing with their emotions.  

Reacting: Something triggers an emotion and you react with a knee-jerk response that is typical of the way you usually react. You tell people things like “Whenever YOU do that it causes me to do this, so stop doing it that way.” Some of these reactions have been repeated thousands of times over your lifetime and are usually learned habits. When this happens, there are usually conditions in place that need to be met in order to trigger it or make it go away.

Responding: Something triggers an emotion and you react with a knee-jerk response that is typical of the way you usually react. At some point (either right away or when you are in the midst of the reaction fog) you stop and take your focus off of the trigger and ask yourself “Is this who I want to be?” Understanding that you are dealing with your own habits and you can chip away at those little by little. You also understand that you have to face the feelings to actually make some headway. This means being brutally honest with yourself. It will require you to say things you don’t want to hear about your behavior and insecurities that you feel control you. This is the hardest part and why it’s easier to lash out and bury the dark feelings. Unless you confront those deep dark recesses of yourself, you may never release whatever is causing the emotional reaction.

Yesterday I shared a motivational artist mp3 with our rogue artists on Patreon. Motivational MP3’s are something I’ve created for myself over the last ten years. Basically, it’s me talking to myself, reminding myself of something that is easy to forget when a particular shit hits a particular fan in my life.

Listen To Rafi’s Motivational MP3’s

I have some recordings on staying motivated as an artist, continuing on despite the obstacles, and remembering that I get to choose my life no matter what the naysayers or I might think. They are my way at chipping away at the habits of insecurity that I may have. 

When you go down a downward spiral of reacting to anything in a negative way (person place or thing) things can easily stack on top of each other and next thing you know, you feel like you are drowning in molasses. 

As an artist, it is easy to feel discouraged, unmotivated, or even stupid and frivolous. We tend to feel lost in a wilderness of solitude surrounded by a world that doesn’t respect or understand what we do or why we do it. It’s easy to feel like you are losing. 

We are constantly just waiting for things to get easier.

I’m sorry, but I am going to be brutally honest with you now… Things never get easier, we just grow, evolve, and find better ways in overcoming obstacles. We form new habits and learn to smile more. We learn to not dwell on the past, or let our negative thoughts (or someone else’s) shape our world. 

It is the struggles, hardships, and moments where we feel we can’t keep going that make us stronger. These are the moments where you have an opportunity to show yourself once and for all who you really are.

So if you have what I like to call “A Momentary Lapse Of Brilliance” that’s fine. Just respond to it. It doesn’t define you. There is no such thing as TOO emotional, or NOT emotional enough… they are both ways of not confronting our own emotional shit.

So get mad and lash out and refuse to let it control you. You fight. You cry. You curse. You punch. You wave your fists at the heavens. Don’t blame the person, place, or thing… look at your own insecurities.

Tell your insecurity,  your bad day, your crappy situation, or whatever else “NOT TODAY!”

I GET TO CHOOSE

I GET TO DECIDE HOW I FEEL TODAY.

I’M IN CONTROL OF WHO I CHOOSE TO BE EVERY MOMENT OF EVERY DAY. 

AND TODAY, I AM FOCUSED ON THE FACT THAT I AM A BADASS.

Then you live your damn life like the badass that you are. 

Remember, chip away… You may only be a teeny bit more badass than yesterday and THAT IS BADASS 🙂